The Business of Being #1

How newspapers turned “Best Of” contests into the most brilliant ad campaign you never voted for.

Every so often, I find myself flipping through the local paper (yes, I still read one), only to be greeted with a familiar chorus of self-promotion:

“Vote for us as the #1 shoe store in town!”
“Vote for us as the best place to get your teeth whitened!”
“Vote for us as Bergen County’s premier brunch spot for picky mother-in-laws!”

It’s like election season, only the candidates are delis, jewelers, car washes, and orthodontists. Democracy at its finest.

Whoever came up with this idea deserves a place in the Marketing Hall of Fame, right next to whoever invented bottled water and pumpkin spice-flavored anything. Instead of selling plain old ads, newspapers and magazines discovered they could sell hope — the hope of being crowned “Best of the Best.” And suddenly, those quarter-page ads turned into full-page spreads with smiling waiters, jewelers polishing diamonds, or bakers holding cupcakes like campaign props.

The genius is that the contest feeds on itself. First, the business pays for ads begging us to vote. Then, if they win, they pay again to trumpet their victory. The publication wins twice — and the business gets a shiny new plaque to hang by the cash register. Everybody’s happy.

Of course, the whole thing has the aura of a county-fair pie-eating contest. Did my neighbor really compare all 47 nail salons in town before casting her vote? Or did she just click the link after her manicurist handed her a flyer that said, “Vote for Us!” I’ll let you guess.

The history of this publishing goldmine likely traces back to the scrappy alternative weeklies of the 1970s and ’80s — The Village Voice, LA Weekly, The Boston Phoenix. Those papers figured out that readers liked lists (who doesn’t?), advertisers liked attention, and editors liked deadlines that could be filled with “Best Burrito” instead of hard-hitting investigative journalism. From there, the fad spread faster than gluten-free pizza.

Now, every town weekly and regional glossy has its annual “Best Of” ballot. Some even turn it into a gala event, complete with trophies, selfies, and social-media hashtags. It’s less journalism and more local Oscars night, except the Academy voters are your neighbors who click on whatever their barber tells them to.

Am I complaining? Not really. It’s harmless, in the same way carnival games are harmless — provided you understand the game is rigged for the house. Newspapers need revenue, small businesses need attention, and we all need something lighthearted to argue about other than politics.

So the next time you’re asked to “Vote for Us as #1 Sushi in Bergen County,” just remember: you’re not really voting for sushi. You’re voting for the world’s most successful advertising gimmick. And the paper thanks you for your service.

Well, that's what I have to say. Stephen M. Flatow